Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Coming out of hiding just to say hi.

Hey guys, so I am still here.  Still dealing with the death of my furbaby.  I think to myself I’m dealing with it fine, I knew she was sick and knew death would be the best thing for her in the end.  She was so weak and so sick and wasn’t eating any more.  So yeah it was best that she passed away, but it still hurts.  I still have her cage in my room because it needs to be cleaned and put away.  I keep telling myself it’s because I’m being lazy about it, but I really feel it’s because that makes it so final.  Seeing her empty cage and looking into it and seeing she isn’t there is what makes the tears start up again.  It’s really time to clean up the cage and put it into storage and finally give myself some peace.  I know she’s fine, wherever it is she may be, and if I’m really lucky I’ll get to see her again.  Who would have thought a little tuff of fur could crawl so deep into your heart and make itself at home there?

Well other than that I've been keeping myself busy looking for a knit doll bodice pattern.  I’ve found a few, one that I’ve used before, but when I knit it up now it’s very tight and I don’t want to use a thicker yarn so I am thinking maybe a slightly bigger needle but it make the top see-thru and that’s just not settling right in my “needs to be as close to realistic as possible” mind.  I want a tight knit, so I guess I need to go up in yarn thickness, add two of the same yarns together when I knit, or add a strip of fabric to the back of the knitted fabric to act as lining.  Ahh!!!  I don’t really like any of those options but I need to try something so I can get back to making some dresses.  I’ve realized I don’t have time to make any dresses in time for Christmas so I am just going to focus on Winter and Spring wear and take some time working up some guy clothing patterns instead of stressing over Christmas stuff.  Hey, am I the only one that is not getting the Christmas spirit this year?  I just don’t feel it.  I’m like “meh” whatever when I think about it.  I mean our tree is sitting in the living room half decorated and no one is rushing to finish it.  I want to finish it but my sister is always busy with work and when she’s off she wants to spend it gaming and whatnot.  I’m thinking of going down there and putting up some ornaments on the tree now since I’ve wanted to do that for a week now.  *sigh*  See what I mean?  It’s just all “meh” around here.

Humm, so anything else I’ve been doing?  Oh yeah, I tried to give my ADG Blythe doll a boiling water hair dip to try to tame her frizzies and it didn’t work.  Still frizzy like crazy.  I’m thinking I will have to do the much feared and get her a Coolcat cap and root it with some nice saran doll hair and then take her cap off, that will be damaged after removal, and put on the new cap.   But once I take her cap off I might want to try to saw into her head and see about fixing her gaze and maybe giving her new eyelashes if her old ones come out easily, which I’ve been hearing mixed reviews on.  I just haven’t done it already because she was a gift from my parents for when I lost 75 pounds.  I’ve since put back on about 40 of those pounds.  Sad smile  So guess what they got me?  Another incentive.  I believe I blogged about it before.  Two vintage dolls that I will get once I lose a large sum of weight.  *sigh*  I just wish I could lose a small sum of weight, but that’s a whole other story that I will get into at a later time.  But back to my doll, her hair is a mess and I don’t want to cut it.  So I am thinking of just dealing with the frizz.  I mean my hair is frizzy so why should I judge her for having frizzy hair, right?  So frizzy it is and who knows, maybe frizzy it will stay.  I’ve wanted to fix her hair because I want to finally take pictures of my dolls in the dresses I’ve made.  I need to set up a nice set for them to take pictures in.  I was thinking a Christmas set, but once again I don’t think I’ll be done in time for Christmas.  I’m still working on a logo.  Sad smile  I thought I had it figured out but I don’t, so yeah.  But I’ve gotten some good advice from “C” of Smidehouse and so I’m going to try tinkering around with my dolls and dresses and see if I can get a decent looking logo.  Fingers crossed tight.

But that’s about all I wanted to talk about today.  I will try to be around more often.  I need to check on my comments still, and just get back to everyone.  This year has just been a crap one on staying on top of everything with being sick, to dealing with crap people, to losing a pet, to still trying to heal myself from years of accidentally self-inflicted abuse…gluten.  That and weight has just turned my poor body into a trash heap.  Does anyone remember Trash Heap from Fraggle Rock?  You know I just went to find a video of her and I didn’t realize the Trash Heap had an accent until today.  LOL!  What accent is that people?  It almost sounds like a northern US accent. Weird, and I LOVED Fraggle Rock so that is super weird I didn’t notice that.  And umm, was her name Marjory?  Wow, I so need to go back and look at this show now that I’m an adult.  I’m sure I’d view it in a different light.  But yeah check out the video to see what I am talking about.  And isn’t it creepy how she always settled back into herself when she was done passing on her words of wisdom?  Or is that just me?  LOL!  But yes, what I have done to my body for most of my life has turned me into a living and breathing trash heap and I think it’s time to clean out the trash and become less of a heap and become healthy.  My dad was told today to lose 40 pounds, so he wants to go the gluten free route because it’s mostly healthy eating due to not being able to eat a lot of processed food.  I don’t think my mom is all for that yet, but she recently got me a Gluten-Free Cooking for Dummies book and it sounds really interesting so I may have her singing another tune soon enough.

Well I was trying not to make this a novel, but too late.  I guess I just love to write and can’t help myself.  *sigh*  I’m off to attack that tree and try to do some cleaning up and sorting through my crafty supplies.  I’m thinking again about trying out the forum thing again.  My last one died because I was at a point where I was to sick to focus on it and to bring it to life.  I want to try it again and this time make it more than just a forum to talk about your dolls and toys.  I want to have swaps, challenges, selling on the site, auctions on the site, scheduled chats on the site, and just make it a fun gathering place for all kinds of doll and toy lovers and hobbyists.  While I love going to the forum for specific dolls, sometimes I’d like a place where you can share all your possessions in one place.  So I am going to attempt it again.  I think will be doing a name change on the forum, not sure, well see in the new year.  Everything is being put off until Jan. 1, 2011.  The rest of this year is simply for organization only.  Once I am organized then I can finally focus on carrying out all the things I want to do.  Oh I have a craft book review coming up that I think may be of interest to some of you, so look forward to that.  Ok, now this really turned into a novel.  I will talk to all your peeps later.  Be good until then.

“The Trash Heap has spoken!  Nyeah!”

Loves ya,
Mouse a.k.a. The Trash Heap Winking smile

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