*Flings self on bed and exhales.*

Ladies and gents today has been one of those days you wished you would have stayed in bed. Ok, so today I had a cleaning appointment. That didn't worry me as much as going with my mom...alone. My mom stresses out alot and when she stresses out I get stressed because I worry about how spastic she's going to get. Well that upsets my stomach and makes the breathing hard and the anxiety shoots through the roof. Well, by the time we were at the dentist, the acid was so badly I just wanted to sit down for a long while and relax. Actually I just wanted to go home, but my appointment was 30 minutes away, so I pressed onward. I got called to the back and by the time I had the last person...3rd person...pulling their fingers out of my mouth, I didn't have a cleaning, and I was told I had the beginnings of periodontal disease. Do you know what sound was going on in my head when I heard that? This: *cricket cricket cricket*. Seriously, I was so in shock I didn't know what to think or say. Then they tell me I have 12 cavities they want to fill with plastic filling, and then I need a tooth reconstruction and two crowns put on my two root canals. Oh and one tooth up front needs to be pulled because it is "extra". Ok, after hearing all this I was so deflated and exhausted. Seriously, I looked at my teeth in the car and I am like I don't see anything wrong. I brush, I floss, I rinse, what the heck is going on?



Well the periodontal disease seems to be a family issue. My grandmother lost all her teeth by 30 and my mom's jawbone is diminishing away and she had horrible gum problems as a kid. My sister has gingivitis and she has good oral hygiene too. I mean she got braces and when they were taken off she only had two cavities, very good by most standards. So its just confusing. The cavities I am so confused on too. I am guessing they are very tiny ones. The doctor kept saying "A pock on 4. Dent on 5." Stuff like that. So I guess its just a tiny bit of decay they want to clean out before it gets serious. My mom thinks it may be all the anti-acids I have been eating. Something is affecting my teeth. I mean granted I hadn't had my teeth cleaned in about 5 years due to need the money for root canals and wisdom teeth removal, but when I did have that cleaning it had been since I was 8 that I had a cleaning and I didn't have a single thing wrong except my wisdom teeth which I knew about. So I am wondering what it is that is messing up my teeth. Its been suggested that the tiny grooves in my teeth where the tooth brush can't reach are why I have so many tiny cavities. Ahhhhhhh!!!

So yeah, that is how I started my day and how most of my afternoon went. So now next year I have a ton of dental work I need to do and its going to be so expensive. I hope I can get better healthwise so I can get a good job so I can either get a better insurance or at least pay for some of this work. I am so thankful to my parents for helping me. I used to say I hate my smile, but I will be so happy if I can get rid of the periodontal disease and can keep it. I read that adding more to daily oral hygiene and getting a deep cleaning could be all you need to get rid of it. I have two appointments set up for my cleaning. One for each side of the mouth one week away. I know that's going to hurt and bad. So I am not really looking forward to next year, but it has to be done. :-( Oh well.



Well after the stress with my mom and the stress with the dentist, then I had to truck it around town some and I was in pain from all the acid. We didn't go to too many places and then went home where I finally got to eat and relax for a bit...until my boyfriend called me. On Tuesday my boyfriend called me before work all chipper and he had just stopped at Subway and gotten some food to eat at work. We had a quick call and then I didn't hear from him until later. He was still ok, and then when I was signing off I said good bye and I'd call him. Well he called me and I thought it was just to say good night to me because he was working late. Not so. I called him back and he was home sounding tired. I was confused and I asked him if he was asleep. He said no. I asked why he was home. He said I obviously hadn't gotten his message. Come to find out he got sick. REALLY SICK. I was so worried. I hate that I had to go to sleep, and he needed sleep too, so we had a quick call and said good night. Today I called him to make sure he was ok before I stepped out the door and he was still sick but felt better. We said our good byes and I went on with the rest of my day. So this brings us back to where I left off. For those who don't know, he's a ct tech at a hospital and he called one of his friends to come give him an iv at his home. His friend came over to give him one and he was so dehydrated he couldn't get the needle in the vein. They tried three times before he decided to take a break to go to the bathroom. On the way to the bathroom his blood pressure dropped and he lost his sight. He forced himself to the floor so he wouldn't pass out and hit his head, thank goodness, and his friend asked if he wanted the ambulance called. My boyfriend was so afraid he was dying he said yes, but then they decided to get him to his bed and try the iv there. They put it in his arm this time and it worked. Seems that his body went into shock and that's why he blacked out. When he told me this I was so scared and shaking. There were tears in my eyes, but I held back on crying so I wouldn't upset him more. Last I checked on him he was on his second iv bag. I need to try calling him in a bit. His mom should be home now so I am a little calmer now knowing he isn't alone. Its so scary to think of him alone and being so sick. I hope he's 100% better tomorrow. I wish I was there to watch over him and take care of him. I'm still worried and scared for him.



So that brings me to now. Exhausted, nervous for my boyfriend, and just wanting to crawl into bed and call it a day. The only perk to come out of today was buying Haute Doll and the coveted recycled bag from Books-a-Million. I want to go out and do some shopping for me and for Christmas still. It seems we have a family outing planned for Saturday when my dad is home. So I guess we will see. So as it stands now, I'm tired, exhausted, nervous, and calling it a day. I hope to have a more cheerful post tomorrow and hopefully something doll related. It seems my shop will be reopening sooner than I thought and on Etsy I believe. I need to start making some money while I can't work. I'll explain more later. Night all. See you tomorrow.

Loves ya,
Mouse