Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Depression, Cleaning, Saints, And Blah

Every day I think about blogging, and every day I tell myself to put it off just a little longer so I can come back fully with stuff to share and talk about. But I just honestly don’t have that yet. I’ve been in the process of cleaning my room and the room I craft in, and not just cleaning but organizing and purging stuff as well. Well with my bum stomach, something that used to take me no time at all to do can take me hours to days to do now. It sucks, but I am dealing with it. I love that I am finally getting more organized, but the rooms are slowly turning into a Hoarders episode the “cleaner” it gets. I have a vision and a drive to get this done, it’s just overwhelming to see everything in the middle of the room and know I have to go through it all still. Ack! Oh well, it will be worth it in the end.

Add on to this that for some crazy reason I am seriously depressed, and have been for the past year, but it’s really getting nasty as of late. I really feel it has something to do with my thyroid medicine. I either have too much or not enough. My hormones are so out of whack I don’t know who I will be from moment to moment. I’m either perfectly fine or curled up in a ball throwing the most awesome pity party this side of the Atlantic. Woo! I see my doctor, maybe, on September 11th, where I am bound to get a lovely round of blood tests to see what’s going on with me. I feel my dosage will change again, but we will see.

Now if all that wasn’t enough to deal with then I have the “blah” portion of stuff I am dealing with. My house is getting work done on the kitchen and bathrooms so there are stranger guys in and out of the house making the loudest noises. Then they take a few days or week break while orders for stuff come in and then they start it all over again. We are currently on a “break”, but they will be back soon, I’m sure of it. For some reason whenever I leave my room they all like to just stare at me, which is just lovely for a shy gal like me who would just like to cross the hall to the other room without it becoming a moment of interest. Well hey, there’s one good thing at least. The guys are kind of cute, so I guess dealing with them for the time being isn’t all that bad. LOL!

My family members all have been dealing with health issues of late, and that stresses me out, and of course my doctor told me not to worry about them and worry about myself instead. Kind of hard to do when it’s right in front of my face all the time. So this is another reason I am really trying to get back to where I can craft and be creative. It helps calm me and pull me out of reality for a while. But I don’t have the ability right now because of the need to clean, so I have found another way to achieve that moment of peace. Video games. Open-mouthed smile

I just got a new game in the mail today, Saints Row 4, and it really helps me let off some steam. I am also playing Guild Wars 2 again, the Sims 3, and Animal Crossing. It’s just a nice break from the daily stress until I can get back to my true love, crafting. It’s hard to have so much I want to do and try craft-wise and not be able to do it. That adds more frustration on me as well, so for now I take it out on aliens and unsuspecting Sims. Mean? Yep. Fun? Hehehehe.

So I was dealing with all this and thought I had things at a comfortable “I can deal with it.” level, and then another wrench is thrown into the gears. “A” just recently told me he’s been experiencing heart issues for the past few months. It sounds a lot like my mom’s heart issues and to know he may have that at such a young age scares me. He’s going through testing now, and I hope it’s just stress and that he needs to take a vacation to relax, but if it is what my mom has it’s permanent, and that just truly scares me. So all of this just makes me feel like I am carrying the hugest boulder on my shoulders. I never really truly understood that saying until recently. Your shoulders truly feel heavy, and you almost feel like you are in pain because of it. It sucks so much, you have no idea. Well, perhaps you do. I know a lot of you are dealing with nasty stuff in your neck of the woods, and if you are, I am sorry. I wish we could all just have fun enjoying our hobbies and living a happy life, but that is just not how it goes sadly. So with that all said, what’s next?

I’m not sure. I am going to keep at the cleaning, and purging things for the shop I am going to open with my mom, that’s not doll related. We are going to try selling new and used things on Amazon. I will still open my doll shop too very soon. I am still tinkering with articles and plan to use them for promoting my shops and blogs. I hope to promote some of my favorite blogs too, not that any of you need that because all your blogs are awesomely popular already. Smile And well, until I can comfortably get back into my craft area, I will continue to kill aliens and torture Sims. LOL! But once I am back in a my crafty nook I will be sewing, crocheting, creating, oh and finally finishing my photostory I started writing years ago so I can move on to the story I really want to start working on. And well, I guess that’s it, for now. If you have read this far, thank you. I feel I owe you something for reading through all that. Hummm, what can I give you. Oh I know!

Kitties!!! What? Who doesn’t love kitties? Well, maybe someone allergic to them or someone who get attacked by a kitty, but other than that, who doesn’t love kittles? Oh fine then. For those of you who don’t like kitties, this is for you.

Puppies!!! You’re welcome. Winking smile And on that note I am off again my lovelies. I’ll be back soon, hopefully with awesome news and fun things to share. I hope all of you are doing well and having tons of dollie fun. Take care until next time. Bye for now. Smile


All Images Used Under Creative Commons
Girl Playing Video Games Image From Free Digital Photos
Kittens Image By Mathias Erhart on Flickr
Puppies Image By Alejandro C on Flickr

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